“I no longer have the energy for meaningless friendships, forced interactions or unnecessary conversations. If we don’t vibrate on the same frequency there’s just no reason for us to waste our time. I’d rather have no one and wait for substance than to not feel someone and fake the funk.”—Joquesse Eugenia (via americanslothball)
I need to get out of this country. The feeling of living outside of Australia was perfect, now being home, it’s lacking, I dont even know how to describe it, all I know is I need to get out and travel/move/explore.
Tonight was my going away party, to think that this year is almost completely over is such a strange feeling. I can’t even begin to think of a place to start writing about all the year, all the feelings I’ve had, the good and the bad, ups and downs. To look back, brings tears to my eyes, and months ago I never thought this would be the case.
To think this place has been my home for the past year, and I’ll be leaving it, never to see it as my home again, this is a goodbye that will be so hard. I cannot describe the rollercoaster year I’ve had, but I am so grateful for the amazing friends I’ve made over here. I have never felt so grateful to people I’ve met, especially in another country, it is hard to think that I’ve relied on these people for a year, and how we can all become to close, in reality, is such a small amount of time, but we have, we made it happen. Everyone one of you have been there for me in a different way, each of you have a place in my heart forever.
From all the coffee dates at starbucks, to gym buddies, to movie nights, to drunken nights, at bars and the shore, we have done so much together. Travelling, to hanging out in Randolph, I will always remember you all. I hope we can all keep in touch. The friends I have made here are for life.
Before I came here, there were people telling me I couldn’t do it, because of my mental illness, saying they won’t let me go, and I shouldn’t go, but boy did I prove them wrong. Being here has not only cured me of my sickness, but made me brave for bigger troubling encounters I will face in life.
Looking at old blog posts, I certainly had doubts that I could finish the year. I remember the 4th month mark, and crying while I tell my friends and family back home, how much I want to leave America, and I now tell myself how proud I am of myself, and how much I’ve succeeded, and grown as a person. I am excited for the future, and ready for more adventures.